A Guide To Surviving The Holidays – The Dilemma of “New Year, New Me”

Ah, the holidays. The “most wonderful time of year”?

The holidays can be extremely daunting. For those visiting family, this means we might be back in the throes of curious family members and concerned parents who might want to know what we’ve been up to or “what’s next?” Yes, we know, it’s going to be a New Year, but maybe we haven’t had enough time this year to really have it all figured out just yet. Instead of being thrown into happy festivities, our family might bring up thoughts of “what have I been up to?”, “have I failed or disappointed them?”, or “I probably haven’t done enough”.

Honestly, most people don’t know what they want to do or what they should be doing, because if we actually knew, this wouldn’t be a common concern. It takes time to figure what we really like or what we want to do.

In the meantime, here are some tips to get you started on the “what’s next?” question:

• Try things that scare you. Think about the thing you want to do, “are you stopping yourself from doing it out of fear of failing?” If so, you might want to give it a try.
• Identify the things you think you should do and then drop the ones that you aren’t aligned with or serve your happiness (e.g. “I should know what I want to do next year after school but I just want to travel” or “I should keep this job because I don’t know if I can find another job”).
• Set the game plan with short-term and long-term goals. Think about where you want to be tomorrow, next month, 6 months from now, 1 year from now, 5 years from now, and 10 years from now.
• If you were to imagine telling people what you did with your life while you’re on your deathbed, what would you want to say you’ve achieved?
• Check-in with family, friends, and other supports (e.g. career counsellor, academic advisor, therapist, support groups) and explore your strengths, values, and interests to figure out what’s next.

And if you’re still feeling confused while being bombarded by all of these thoughts and everything everyone is asking, take a breather. As much as we are talking about figuring out what’s next or setting goals, it’s helpful to take a pause and breathe before going straight into solutions and actionable items. It’s okay to take time to figure these things out.

We also have a great team of therapists who can help if you’re feeling really stuck or confused.